I have said it and I have heard it said more than once by more than a few people that change is difficult; changing is hard. Most times we know that changing will lead to a better outcome. Nevertheless, we still balk at it – changing our ways, changing our diets, changing our conversations, changing our associations. Ultimately, it is our perception of change that causes us to remain stagnant. Somehow, we have concluded that change means everything has to be done all at once. We have to give up all of our favorite dishes all at once. We have to cut ties with certain people immediately. We put these imaginary restrictions on ourselves that we instinctively rebel against.
Perhaps the word “adjustment” may be more palatable for us. An adjustment is a small alteration or movement made to achieve a desired fit, appearance or result. Note that it is just a small thing that we can choose to do to move ourselves in our desired direction. A small decision that we can make that will move us toward our goal; that will bring us closer to where we desire to be. Making an adjustment allows us to show ourselves some grace as we move forward. For example, instead of giving up all of our favorite foods, we can decide to give up just one, or we can decide to commit to exercise more. And, instead of cutting ties, we can decide to distance ourselves – not be as available. You know, “feed them with a long handled spoon.” Once we have adapted to the first small movement, then we move on to another, then another, and before you know it, we have made so many adjustments until we have changed! Mission accomplished with less pain and anxiety.
Maybe you do not care for the word adjustment; there are plenty of others to choose from – tweaking, modifying, fine-tuning, etc. The important thing is to find what will work for you and do it, so that you can move towards living the abundant life intended for you.