The expectations we place on those we care about, whether it is with spouses, children, family, friends, significant others, or spiritual leaders, are sometimes more than the person is willing and/or capable of actually providing. Our expectations usually come from an area where there is a “need,” and we want that need supplied or that “void” filled. When the need is not met or the void is not filled, we often find ourselves unfulfilled, discouraged, despondent, and sometimes depressed.
I believe God wants us to be so full of Him that there is no “neediness” in our lives. As a result, anything else we receive from others would be “perks” or “fringe benefits.” We are to be totally complete in God.
Ephesians 3:19, “And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fullness of God.”
Ephesians 5:18, “And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled with the Spirit.”
Colossians 1:9. “For this reason we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding.”
The enemy preys upon our affections and emotions, particularly when we continually reach out to others for what we are needing or lacking in our lives. This causes us to put ourselves on the line to show others love, kindness and consideration. However, when we do this and our affections are not reciprocated, it creates a wound; and we have to go through a healing process. That is why the Lord wants us to be filled with all fullness in Him. When we are full of Him, rejection, emptiness, loneliness, neediness, etc., are not issues; because there is no room for that – we are already full. When we are full of Him, we no longer expect others to fulfill our needs. Instead, we reach out to others from a place of overflow, because our fullness is in God. We are complete in Him.
If we are not full of Him and continually being filled, we will wander around in life just as the children of Israel did in the wilderness, except we will be wandering around in a vicious circle of LOVE-REJECTION-HURT-HEALING-LOVE-REJECTION-HURT-HEALING, and so forth and so on. “Ever learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.” 2 Timothy 3:7.